“O Yamaha, Where Art Thou?” – Part 2

Sprung from a budget and trying to reach the seller’s home to recover the hidden loot of  a heist, our bogan is confronted by a series of obstacles – among them police sirens, a derelict, and a prophet who warns that “the treasure you seek shall not be the treasure you find.”

Eureka! The Wealthy Bogan discovers a prospect – clean, tidy, and a bit pricey, but he planned to talk the seller down. Upon arrival, it was clear that this Gumtree seller had grown resistant to such negotiation techniques; he insists that a bike of such lustre cannot be purchased with so little coin.

After the failed inspection at the Hills in the land of Adelaide, the Bogan and his twelve dollars in cash were driven off course by discouragement.  He visited the lethargic Pill-Eaters who gave his men their fruit which would have caused them to forget their homecoming had the Bogan not dragged them back to the Commodore by force.

After falling off-course, they re-embarked and encountered the opportunistic EB Games. All of the Bogan’s dollars entered the harbor of the cash register and were immediately destroyed.

Next, the Bogan met the spirit of his own brother, who had (almost) died of boredom during his long absence. From him, he got his first news of the potential treasure lying await at the Port of Adelaide.

Returning from Yorke’s peninsula, they were advised by him on the remaining stages of the journey. They landed at the bay of Glenelg, where our hero narrowly escaped capture by the local Sheriff. Washed ashore at the Port of Adelaide, he was compelled to remain there as a cashed-up-bogan until he was instructed by Gumtree, via the seller, to inspect the bike for sale. The Bogan did not realise how long it would take to get home, to his family.

Having listened with rapt attention to his story, the Gumtree Seller, who is a skilled mechanic, displays signs of resistance to the Bogan’s tactical offer. The Bogan employs skills of haggling and debauchery – they prove powerful. The weary seller agrees to trade the Bogan the motorcycle, a Yamaha YZ125.  They deliver the bike to his trailer and he ties it down. Having saved $40 a week from the beginning of the year, the Bogan now had almost $500, meaning he withdrew only $1,000 in coin from his banking account! Despite widely acclaimed criticism, his strategy had worked.

The next chapter of this thrilling series focuses on our Bogan hero, king of Adelaide, and his journey to the Port of Gawler after the fall of the Gumtree seller.

To be continued…


One thought on ““O Yamaha, Where Art Thou?” – Part 2

  1. Yessssssss. Nothing like a budget dirt bike!

    Look, I won’t lie, it’s an expensive hobby. 6 months ago, I financed a brand new european dirt bike. My first new anything after having owned a few shockers (made most of my money back on them though!)

    I swear, two enormous forces pull at me. I am frugal in every single other sense, but this one hobby just has me by the balls. Having said that, with a closet full of abused riding gear and the bike almost paid off, the only expense for a day in the dirt is about 5 litres of fuel… Not bad for the returns in joy…

    One recommendation from me…. Invest in motocross protection!! I wear all the gear, but thought knee braces were “too expensive” at $700… Had a very mild stack at about 20km/h… torn MCL, over $2k at the physio and almost 6 weeks of lost income was a HELLUVA lot more expensive. Especially for something easily prevented by good knee braces.

    Keep us posted!


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